Obstacles Hindering Contentment: An Examination of Two Deterrents
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In a contribution to "Psychology Today," US psychologist Steven C. Hayes, co-founder of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) and foundation professor at the University of Nevada in Reno, delves into the complexities of happiness.
Hayes compares suppressing negative emotions to trying to hold a water balloon underwater; it pops back up with force. He advises against this approach, as it can exacerbate fears and negatively impact our well-being and health. Instead, he suggests accepting negative feelings, letting go, and acting consciously and committedly according to one's values.
Positive emotions, such as pleasure, inspiration, gratitude, love, awe, interest, pride, joy, calmness, and hope, contribute to our well-being. However, if we expect or demand that everything be perfect, we lose sight of the actual purpose of emotions, which should guide us in the present.
Hayes writes that positive emotions are valuable because they pass and can be sought, created, and enjoyed, but should be let go. True happiness comes from perceiving, enjoying, and letting go of things, not from demanding consistency.
The difference between Experiential Attachment (EA) and Positivity Prioritizing (PP) in pursuing happiness lies in their approach to positive emotions. EA involves a clingy demand to hold onto positive feelings rigidly, often leading to diminished happiness over time, whereas PP focuses on actively seeking joyful experiences.
A study co-authored by Hayes found that EA consistently dampened happiness because people who tightly grip positive feelings often end up crushing their joy, while PP, when done adaptively, fostered increased well-being but only for certain subgroups. Some people benefitted from PP by engaging in positive actions, but for others, PP sometimes morphed into EA and reduced happiness.
This research employed ecological momentary assessment to track 167 individuals repeatedly over weeks, revealing dynamic patterns in real time rather than relying on cross-sectional snapshots. The study advocates for recognizing personalized ("idionomic") ways people strive for happiness rather than treating all pursuit of positive states as alike.
Steven Hayes also promotes psychological flexibility in ACT, which encourages acceptance of emotions—including negative ones—rather than clinging to positive states. This aligns with the idea that experiential attachment can be counterproductive while mindful engagement can foster mental health.
In conclusion, Hayes advises doing something loving to feel more love, creating something beautiful to see more beauty, trying to catch a happy moment and letting it go, and asking oneself what small thing can be done to bring more happiness into one's life. If one is not ready to lose positive emotions, they have already lost them, according to Hayes. The key is to accept, enjoy, and let go, fostering a more meaningful and fulfilling life.
References:
[1] Hayes, S. C., Sahdra, B., et al. (2019). Experiential avoidance, experiential acceptance, and well-being: A longitudinal examination of experiential attachment and positivity prioritizing. Journal of Positive Psychology.
[2] Sahdra, B., Hayes, S. C., et al. (2019). Experiential attachment and positivity prioritizing: A test of their effects on well-being. Journal of Research in Personality.
[3] Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (1999). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: An Experiential Approach to Behavior Change. New York: Guilford Press.
[4] Hayes, S. C., & Strosahl, K. D. (2004). Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life: The New Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. New York: Guilford Press.
[5] Hayes, S. C., & Smith, V. A. (2005). Acceptance and Commitment Therapy: An Experiential Approach to Behavior Change. New York: Guilford Press.
Science plays a significant role in understanding the complexities of mental health and health-and-wellness, as demonstrated by the research conducted by psychologist Steven C. Hayes, particularly his findings on experiential attachment and positivity prioritizing. His work delves into the intricate relationship between these approaches and their impact on individual's well-being and mental health.
