Navigating the Festive Season
As the holiday season approaches, it's important to remember that this time can bring a mix of emotions, including joy, happiness, grief, and sadness. For those who are grieving or dealing with trauma triggers, managing the stress of the holiday season can be especially challenging. However, by prioritising self-care, creating supportive environments, and establishing new, comforting traditions, it is possible to find moments of joy amidst grief or trauma.
One key strategy is to prioritise self-care. This means planning specific actions before, during, and after holiday events to enhance resilience. Maintaining healthy eating, hydration, and sleep routines, engaging in gentle exercise or relaxation techniques like deep breathing, and practising mindfulness and reflective activities such as meditation, journaling, or creative expression can all help to calm the nervous system and manage stress levels.
Another important aspect is creating new traditions. Instead of feeling obligated to participate in potentially distressing large gatherings, consider establishing soothing alternatives that bring comfort, such as quiet walks, intimate movie marathons with supportive friends, or small dinners focusing on gratitude and meaningful connections.
It's also important to set realistic expectations for the holiday season. Accept that the season may be imperfect and allow space for emotions, focusing on moments and activities that truly matter to your well-being. Reach out for support from trusted friends, family, or mental health professionals, even if only briefly around gatherings, to counter feelings of isolation and receive emotional support. Building a support network also aids in co-regulation during trauma triggers.
Using trauma-informed coping tools, such as imagining a safe place in detail, and employing grounding or focal exercises, can help manage trauma-triggered distress during the holidays. It's also important to be mindful of situations or substances that may worsen stress or PTSD symptoms, and plan coping strategies accordingly.
Incorporating meaning-making activities, such as creating memory boxes or other symbolic gestures, can help acknowledge loss without letting it dominate the season. It's important to remember that emotions during the holidays, especially during grief, can be paradoxical and contradictory. Recognise and understand these feelings, as they may be a reminder of what still needs to be processed or worked on.
Putting oneself as a priority is crucial during the holidays when extra demands are common. It's important to remember that we have choices and can modify activities and participation to suit our needs. Remember that your daily routine should not end during the holidays, as your everyday practices help to calm and centre you.
Moments of joy can be found in various activities such as spending time with family or friends, connecting with nature, reading a good book, watching holiday movies, or hiking with pets. Self-compassion, grace, and self-care are emphasised as important for staying balanced during the holiday season.
As Moshe Davis once said, "A candle is a small thing. But one candle can light another. And see how its own light increases, as a candle gives its flame to the other. You are such a light." This holiday season, let's remember to be our own light, to prioritise our well-being, and to find moments of joy amidst grief or trauma.
[1] Self-Care for Grief and Trauma During the Holidays. (2021). Verywell Mind. Retrieved from [https://www.verywellmind.com/self-care-for-grief-and-trauma-during-the-holidays-4180465](https://www.verywellmind.com/self-care-for-grief-and-trauma-during-the-holidays-4180465)
[2] Holiday Stress and Coping. (2021). HelpGuide.org. Retrieved from [https://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/holiday-stress-and-coping.htm](https://www.helpguide.org/articles/stress/holiday-stress-and-coping.htm)
[3] Managing Grief During the Holidays. (2021). National Alliance on Mental Illness. Retrieved from [https://www.nami.org/About-NAMI/NAMI-News-and-Media/News-and-Press-Releases/2019/November/Managing-Grief-During-the-Holidays](https://www.nami.org/About-NAMI/NAMI-News-and-Media/News-and-Press-Releases/2019/November/Managing-Grief-During-the-Holidays)
[4] Coping with Holiday Stress and Grief. (2021). American Psychological Association. Retrieved from [https://www.apa.org/topics/holiday-stress-grief](https://www.apa.org/topics/holiday-stress-grief)
Therapists may recommend establishing new health-and-wellness routines, such as self-care practices, to manage stress and feelings of grief during the holiday season. Science supports the effectiveness of activities like yoga, meditation, and journaling in promoting mental health and resilience.
By setting realistic expectations and focusing on self-care, individuals can make the holiday season a time of healing rather than a source of added stress or trauma. Seeking support from mental health professionals, friends, and family can further enhance one's ability to cope during this difficult time.
